Rachel and Nicole Nelson of Moorhead, Minnesota, are awaiting the birth of their second child. Sanford Health helped this same-sex couple navigate the reproductive process for their first child, and now that the Nelsons are expecting No. 2, the pair looks forward to that support again.
“When we decided to start building a family, we didn’t know where to start,” Rachel said. “We reached out and they pointed us in the right direction at Sanford Reproductive Medicine. They sat down with us and answered all our questions – and answered questions that we initially didn’t know we should be asking.”
The Sanford Reproductive Medicine Clinic in Fargo, North Dakota, offers treatments for various fertility issues and services that can improve your reproductive health and help you grow your family. The Nelsons, their 18-month-old daughter Atlas – as well as the baby girl they’re expecting in November – deliver proof of that.
Rachel and Nicole were in unison in wanting a family. Rachel, who carried Atlas, had a longstanding desire to become a mother. Now Nicole is carrying Atlas’ sister.
“I always knew from a young age I wanted to be a mom,” Rachel said. “It was never a question for me. I knew at some point I wanted to pass things down to my children – I wanted to experience life with children, not just with my spouse.”
Growing their family
Photo courtesy the Nelson family
The Nelsons have been together for more than nine years and a married couple for four years. Nicole is from the Twin Cities and a manager at ScentAir. Rachel, originally from East Grand Forks, Minnesota, is a chiropractor with her own practice.
When they decided they wanted to have children, they both went through reproductive testing at Sanford. Ultimately, they decided Rachel would carry their first.
They tried six times unsuccessfully to conceive via IUI (intrauterine insemination). In this procedure a donor’s sperm is placed directly into the uterus using a small catheter.
They then moved on to IVF (in vitro fertilization) and were successful. In this procedure, Rachel’s egg and the donor’s sperm were joined in a laboratory dish. Baby Atlas was born in January of 2023.
Atlas has done a fine job of marketing the happiness that comes with having a family. The wait has been rewarded.
“Atlas has been amazing,” Nicole said. “She has been so much fun – the best daughter we could ever ask for. Now we’re going to try to replicate that.”
Reproductive treatment options
The couple can now reflect on all the effort that went into her birth. As a same-sex couple, the Nelsons knew there would be distinctive challenges involved in starting a family. Hearteningly, they know now Sanford Health will be there to help them through whatever comes their way.
“Obviously being a same-sex couple, we have to seek out some sort of reproductive treatment,” Rachel said. “They laid out a roadmap map for us and showed us all of our options and told us which option would be best. There were some hurdles that we had to jump through and some of those options that we chose didn’t work right away. We kept trying and then when they thought that we should move to the next step, they let us know right away.”
Christina Broadwell, M.D., and Sheena Rippentrop, M.D., were there for them, explaining and counseling on these next steps.
Dr. Broadwell, a reproductive endocrinologist, talked with the Nelsons about the challenges encountered by LGBTQ+ communities in building families. Assisted reproductive interventions are unique to couples’ situations and based on needs, circumstances, age, gender, reproductive health status and personal health status.
“Most these individuals will be using a third party to help with building their family and to help them have children,” Dr. Broadwell said. “That could be using a sperm donation, egg donation, embryo donation, gestational carrier or any combination of those. It is important to start that conversation early to achieve their goals in a timely fashion.”
‘Sanford Health is very welcoming’
How should couples seek out third-party assistance? What do couples need to consider when navigating this part of the process?
“It is important to consider what that can entail,” Dr. Broadwell said. “We also talk about dealing with societal bias. Ultimately in those first conversations what we’re really trying to establish is that Sanford Health is a safe place and very welcoming. I want them to embrace the choices they have and to really learn all they need to know about their options and feel comfortable with their care.”
The upcoming birth of their second daughter represents their level of comfort with Dr. Broadwell and Dr. Rippentrop as well as the Nelsons’ comfort with being parents.
“When Atlas was born, I was already a mom and wanted to be a mom,” Nicole said. “When I saw the bond between Atlas and Rachel it changed my mind more on wanting to carry a child myself. I would be more willing to carry.”
The Nelsons’ plan has undergone some alterations. They anticipated when deciding to have children that they could start having them right away. Then they waited and came to understand patience in this case was not only a virtue but also a necessity. Expertise and support from Sanford made for caring partners along the way.
“More than likely there is always a light at the end of the tunnel,” Rachel said. “It will work out the way it is supposed to. No matter how hard it seems to find your way out of the middle of a storm, there is usually a way out. And the end of the storm is better than you could ever imagine.”
Learn more
- From IVF to NICU: One couple’s road to starting a family
- Sanford fertility expert helps same-sex couples
- LGBTQ+ patients can find high-quality care at Sanford Health
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Posted In Fargo, Inclusion at Sanford, Pregnancy, Women's
